Emotional Intelligence: Engaging At Your Best

We all know when we are bringing our best to a situation. And, we all know when we’re having an off day. For optimal emotional intelligence (understanding your thoughts and feelings, and in turn, relating in the best ways with others), what are some things you can do for engaging at your best?

Getting Focused

Most times when people aren’t doing their best, most productive and highly creative work, it’s because they aren’t focused. In today’s business environment, it’s all to easy to become unfocused by the many tasks to get done, streams of media coming at us all day long and so forth.

As smart professionals, you have a simple and powerful tool at your disposal. It’s the following phrase:

What am I trying to accomplish?

In the course of a busy and hectic day, priorities become a blur as you are just trying to make your way through the day. Many people are aware of when they are going into overload. At that moment, ask yourself, “What am I trying to accomplish?” In seconds, the answer will come to you. With that answer in hand, quickly look at what you’re doing, and if it’s not the highest priority task, change gears.

Calming Yourself Down

Ever see somebody spin out of control – panic in his or her eyes, face red, you can feel their sense of desperation. We’ve all been there.

The fact is that when you are panicked, you aren’t thinking logically and objectively (in other words, with high emotional intelligence).


Calm brings focus.

What people forget is that there are a variety of ways to become calm. Since we were all babies, we learned how to calm ourselves and that skill is still in our heads.

So often you hear the advice, “Take a breath.” In fact, using your emotional intelligence to temporarily disengage from a situation, stepping back and quieting down, begins a process of increased clarity.

Combining Calming and Focus

If you look at these two forces as a two-step process, you now have a powerful emotional intelligence tool.

That is, if you begin by calming yourself down, you then are in a logical and objective position to ask, “What am I trying to accomplish?”

(By the way, for teams, “What are we trying to accomplish?” also works well.)

Our minds possess some amazing abilities, if just position yourself to bring your best, forward.

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